Oh, my sweet little one! I love you so much already. I rarely get the chance to sit down and talk to you or connect with you in any way because your big sister takes up a whole lotta time, so I can already tell that you're going to be very self-sufficient. You'll have to be, there's just no other way. Sorry.
Tonight, though, after a wonderful weekend with Daddy and Sylvia, I finally got a second to slow down and think about you. I'm picturing your sweet little fingers and toes, your eyes and your ears and your chubby little cheeks. I know you're growing and changing every day, because - whether I notice it or not, and I usually don't - I'm growing and changing every day with you. My body is your home and I'm doing my best to keep things calm in there.
It's amazing how "zen" your presence has made me. I move much more slowly and quietly in the classroom these days, and I try not to worry or freak out about every little thing Sylvia does. I don't want those worry vibes to pass on to you (or to her)! With you growing inside, nothing else really matters to me. You are the most important.
It's been a long eighteen weeks. We've moved into a new house, we survived a wonderful holiday season with lots of family, and your sister just keeps getting bigger and there's nothing I can do to stop it! To be honest, on most days I forget I'm even pregnant - which just goes to show that you're already a wonderful baby. With the exception of a little nausea in the beginning, you really haven't given me any trouble to speak of. Usually, I don't get the chance to think about you until after Sylvia's gone to bed and I've finished all the chores I've designmated for myself. I finally lay down to go to sleep, and that's when I say, "Oh! Hi there, baby! How was your day?" And you, of course, give me little flutters and kicks to remind me that you're in there, just hanging out, minding your own business. "Don't mind me, Mama. I'm just doing my thing."
I can tell you like it in there, and I hope you stay in there for a good, long time. Enjoy the peace and quiet while you have it, because there are LOTS of people here who can't wait to snatch you up and smother you with kisses. Your Daddy is already so excited to meet you, and your sister won't stop talking about you. She gives you lots of pats and kisses, and she's been practicing how to take care of you by tending to her baby dolls. I promise I won't let her rip your head off. It's a hazard that comes with the territory, though. You're sure to be one tough kid by the time you're done growing up with her!
We all love you so, so much, baby. And I love having this time to spend with you. I love being your Mama and I love keeping you safe and warm. I can't wait to hold you and rock you and smell you and sing to you. Life is so much fun!
Keep growing, little one.
I love you,