I mentioned in my last post that I was toying around with the idea of giving up Facebook for Lent. For one thing, it's a crazy time waster and I have a million better things to do, like read good books and play with my kids. For another thing, I'm starting to notice the way it has slowly consumed my life. I'm obsessed with finding out EVERYONE'S NEWS! I get that from my Grandma Neltner. She is notorious for spending her evenings dialing up everyone she knows just to say hi and see how they're doing. She knows everyone's news. It's an addiction, I'm sure of it. I'm obsessed with other people's families and baby pictures and recipes and vacations. It's just not a very good way to live, constantly comparing myself to others this way. Also, I tend to spend my entire day thinking in status updates. Something amazing or noteworthy (or cute or funny or ridiculous) will happen to me and I immediately draft my status for Facebook in my head. I believe this is also unhealthy and downright exhausting, so I need to cut - it - out!
However, Facebook sometimes feels like my only connection to the real, adult world. It's where I hang out at night to chat with my friends, because we can't go out to bars anymore now that we all have kids and jobs and grown up things in the way, not to mention we're all exhausted and the thought of leaving my house after 8pm is terrifying. I also like that I can shout my news to the world and only say it once, like when our babies were born. It's a great way to give important information quickly! When I first considered the idea, I thought it really was an impossible task. I just NEED it too much, and when I examined that feeling of NEEDING it, I knew I had to quit. Cold turkey!
I've been thinking a lot about the sacrifice behind my idea and wondering if it's a good enough sacrifice to honor God's son. The truth is, I'm starting to look forward to my Facebook-free time and now I feel like it's not ENOUGH because it might not hurt as much as I think it will. It might be kind of fun. And Lent is a good excuse, so no one will chastise or judge me for going off the grid, so to speak. In the end, I've realized that no sacrifice is ENOUGH and I won't know how much it hurts until I try. It will be hard not to jump on there and tell everyone the funny things that Sylvia says. Or the news about the sex of our baby! But at the same time, I'm not giving up communication altogether. I'm hoping to blog more and "status update" less. I want to stop recording all the teeny tiny moments and start recording my thoughts and feelings about the BIG moments and the IMPORTANT issues that I want my girls to someday read.
So, before I hop over to Facebook and bid my farewell, between the end of this post and the beginning of that one, I'll close my computer and say my prayers. I'll pray for willpower and stamina to see it through. I'll pray for patience and peace. I'll pray to be closer to God and to bring him closer to my family while I'm NOT checking Facebook all day long. We'll see how it goes. I'm looking forward to the journey.
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